Society’s Standards

Over the years, standards have been set. You should have a job, have your own living quarters, and heck, even have sex at a certain age according to society. I can understand how some of these standards have become expected, but I think that for them to be set in stone and expected to be followed by every individual is simply wrong.

I can understand why certain standards are set – I can. People should try hard to find employment and their own living quarters by a certain point in their life. I don’t, however, think it’s necessarily up to us to decide when that point should be for others.

I think that when people feel they are ready to do something, that is when they should. While people shouldn’t use this way of thinking to shirk their responsibilities or not work hard, I do think that it’s okay that not everyone does everything at the same time. We’re all different and sometimes things are harder for some of us than they are for others. This does not mean that we give up or don’t keep trying our hardest to accomplish our goals, but rather that we don’t constantly beat ourselves up for not always meeting society’s standards.

A word that I really don’t like is ‘pathetic’. So many people who are less than understanding throw this word at people when society’s standards are not met. No one is perfect and people struggle – struggling is difficult and no one enjoys it.

It may be hard to see at times, but even those who struggle are often trying their best. Things may not be as easy for some of us as for others, but this does not mean that we’re not putting our best foot forward.

If you find yourself struggling and comparing yourself to others, remember this: no one is perfect! You are not alone. You don’t have to meet society’s standards. All you have to do is try your hardest and never give up on becoming the best you can be!

 

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The ‘Norm’

So lately I’ve been feeling a bit down. I’m still struggling with anxiety and it still holds me back from doing many of the things I love. Also, while I don’t hate living at home still, I know a lot of people my age aren’t still living with their parents.

I’m not going to lie – it can be very depressing. I want to be more independent and have a job, but my anxiety stands in the way. Maybe to some people that seems like an excuse, but it’s not. Anxiety can be a very powerful thing and it can make you feel like your unable to do even the simplest of things.

The thing is that while it’s good to have goals, we sometimes need to stop focusing so much on what’s considered ‘the norm’ and instead focus on doing the best we can. It really does no good to sit around and feel guilty or pathetic that you maybe still live with your parents or don’t have a job. As my dad said, we all do things at different times in our life and while we should have goals and shouldn’t use our issues as an excuse, it’s okay if we don’t do everything at the same speed as others.

The important thing is that we continue to try our hardest and that we never give up on our goals. If we work hard on a consistent basis, we can and will be successful. I know it’s hard not to let what’s considered normal dictate your life and not to feel bad if you don’t fit in with what’s considered ‘proper’, but sometimes things happen that cause us to stray from the norm. Straying from the norm does not make us pathetic or weird, but rather means that we’re different or have different issues than some other individuals may have.

Before I end this post, I want to tell you this. Don’t let anyone make you feel pathetic that you don’t fit in with the norm. Like I said, sometimes life doesn’t turn out how we wish it would and sometimes there are circumstances that make things a little harder. The only real failure in life is giving up completely. If you’re not happy with how things are, you can always change them. Don’t allow others to bring you down and don’t put too much pressure on yourself. Just work hard!

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We’ll Get Through This!

For almost a week now, I’ve been struggling with something. For a while I was doing really well, but for some reason lately, things have been tough. It’s not that I haven’t been trying, but when it comes down to it, I can’t seem to get this particular thing accomplished. To be honest, it’s starting to really upset me.

I know deep down that I can do this, that I can succeed. I’ve seen myself do it before and I know I have both the ability and strength to get through my anxiety. Still though, it’s hard. It’s hard to see myself make so much progress and then see myself taking steps backwards. I don’t want to lose momentum.

It’s weird. On one hand I have faith in myself, but on the other, it’s difficult to have that faith. It can be difficult to believe you can get through something when you keep seeing yourself shy away from the challenge at hand. However, I know deep down that I can do this!

When you start to notice that you’re struggling, you have to take actions to prove to yourself that you’re stronger than your anxiety. Take me for example. I’ve been having a hard time doing something lately so what am I planning on doing? I’m planning on exercising and stretching more – showing myself that I can get through this!

I have another piece of advice that I think will be helpful. While I know that this isn’t always easy, sometimes we need to stop putting so much pressure on ourselves. Every day since I’ve been struggling with accomplishing the task I’m speaking of, I obsess about it. I worry that I’ll never be able to get it done, I worry that I’ll fall into the pattern of not succeeding. My advice? Try your hardest not to think about it. Say to yourself, “Okay, I’m struggling with this. I’ll try my hardest to stretch, exercise, and practice facing my fears in small steps. I won’t think about [insert task here] for the rest of the day. If I get it done tomorrow, great. If I don’t, I’ll keep working on it”.

Obsessing can be a dangerous thing. Obsessing can make problems seem bigger, scarier. Obsessing just allows anxiety to build up and control us. DON’T ALLOW ANXIETY TO WIN! Remember: you are stronger than your anxiety!

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Holding On To the Feeling of Progress!

This morning I succeeded at something that I haven’t really done in a long time, or at least I haven’t done it as well as I did today. It’s something that I’ve been struggling with for a while and although I did manage to kind of succeed at it a little while ago, this is the first time in a long time that I really felt like I did a good job at it. It felt wonderful to make progress and realize that I have the ability to achieve my goals.

I just recently went to my therapist’s and he was saying how I have to realize that when I make progress and succeed at something that it’s not just luck. I wasn’t lucky today when I accomplished my goal, but rather I accomplished my goal because I am capable of making progress and facing my fears. I am stronger than my anxiety.

I think that it’s so easy (especially in times of struggling), to forget just how strong we are. I know that for me, it’s almost become habit to worry about things, to feel like I can’t do certain things. However, I have the ability to succeed and I’ve proven that to myself more than just once. It just takes consistent effort and practice to continue to show myself that I can get through my anxiety and overcome my obstacles.

It’s so important that when we succeed and make progress, that we hold on to the amazing feeling that achieving our goals provides. Achieving our goals proves to us that we are capable of making progress. Please realize that when you succeed at something, that it’s not just luck, but rather it’s your hard work paying off!

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Seizing Opportunities!

Hey guys! As many of you know, my dream career is to be a professional writer. For many years, I’ve been writing different poems, stories, and articles and submitting them to various places in hopes to get published.

Now I admit, it’s been a struggle. I know that there have been plenty of famous writers for whom it’s taken years and years to become successful, but that doesn’t mean that it wouldn’t be nice to see my work published at an early age. Now, don’t get me wrong, I haven’t gotten any novels published or made any money for the one poem that I had published, but I have had articles published now on different sites and blogs. The feeling is amazing! I also just recently got an amazing writing opportunity and am quite happy about it!

Most of the places that have published my articles have not offered me money, but that’s okay. Would it be nice if all these places paid for writing? Of course! However, I don’t write for the money or even the fame, but rather to get my work out there, and in many cases, hopefully help others.

Ever since I started writing this blog, opportunities have been coming my way. I have written guest posts for other blogs, I have written for The Seeds 4 Life (Thank you so much, Matt!), Battle of Mind, Youshare Project, and The Mighty. All of these bloggers and blogs have allowed me to share my experiences and I thank each and every one of them so much! I am so honored to be given the opportunity to be a part of these sites.

While I had some friends come to me and ask me if I’d be interested in these opportunities, I also had to do a great deal of the work myself. I had to search for the sites, research them, and then of course, write for them. I couldn’t just hear about the opportunities, I had to seize them!

I’m happy that I took advantage of these opportunities. I’ve met some fabulous people and discovered some great blogs! I’ve found that I do have the ability to write well and help others through my writing. Also, I’m proud to say that I feel like I’m on the right track to success!

I wanted to write this post to remind all of you that you have the ability to succeed, to accomplish your goals. Things may not come all at once or even quickly, but if you keep working at it, success will happen! Please don’t give up on your positive dreams!

 

**A special thank you to everyone who has worked with me and supported me!

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Accomplishments!

Yesterday I accomplished something that I’m quite proud of! I did this with no anxiety and let me tell you, it felt amazing! For a little while, I was very conscious of what was going on, but then I started to relax and as I was succeeding, I realized just how great it all felt.

I was, and still am, super proud of myself. I told my parents and a friend how happy I was to have succeeded and they were all very proud of me. A part of me felt silly being so proud and expressing this pride, but then I realized something with the help of a friend: there is no accomplishment too small to be proud of and quite frankly, I don’t think my accomplishment was very small at all. It’s one thing to get through something and another to do so without feeling any anxiety, and I’m very proud to say that I did a job well done!

This leads me to another point: any progress that is made should be celebrated in a healthy way, whether it’s considered big or small. Also, while you shouldn’t depend on others for recognition, there is nothing wrong with sharing your happiness. Additionally, while some people may not appreciate your accomplishments, others will and these are the people that you should be most grateful for (not that you shouldn’t be grateful for the other people in your life. Some people just have a difficult time understanding what they do not struggle with).

I would like to thank the first friend I shared my success with (you know who you are!). Thank you so much for being here for me, for listening, and for always caring. Your friendship means the world to me and so does your support. Seriously, I’m so happy to have met you!

I also want to thank everyone who supports me. I want to thank those who take the time to read, comment on, and ‘like’ posts on my blog. I want to thank those who take the time to email me and really get to know me while at the same time respecting my privacy. Thank you so much!

Please remember guys: no amount of progress is too small to celebrate! Even if some others may not understand the big deal, succeeding at something positive always matters! So be proud of yourself, be grateful, and remember that succeeding means that you have the ability to get over your obstacles!

 

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