Seeking Approval

Hi everybody! So, I know that I’ve touched on this subject before, but I’d like to talk about how many of us spend our time seeking the approval of others.

There is one person in particular who I’ve noticed I’m constantly trying to ‘impress’ – my mom. Unfortunately, she isn’t someone who really understands my struggle with anxiety as much as I would hope, which, in turn, makes me feel the need to show her that I am, in fact, making progress. The thing is, however, that I shouldn’t have to point it out to her and doing so, makes me feel kind of pathetic.

Don’t get me wrong – my mom has started noticing on her own that I’m doing better in some cases. This makes me extremely happy and proud of myself. Still, I find myself asking, “Did I do well?” and when I hear myself ask this, I find myself becoming a bit disappointed in myself. Why? Because it shouldn’t matter what my mom or anyone else says or thinks. As long as I’m making progress and recognize this fact, that’s all that should matter.

Therefore, I’ve decided something – not to ask the question of whether or not someone thinks I’ve done well at something. If someone wants to express how well I did themselves, that’s great – if not, that’s okay too. I’m going to depend on myself to judge my progress.

I think that by allowing myself to decide when I’ve done well, I’m giving myself more confidence – I’m not waiting for someone else to give me praise or determine how successful I’ve been. In my opinion, allowing others to judge us just adds unnecessary anxiety. So please don’t wait for others to say that you’re doing a good job, pat yourself on the back when you do well!

 

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Getting Better (and recognizing it)!

I’ve been reflecting lately on something extremely important – how I really have made a good amount of progress when it comes to getting through my anxiety. While I admit that I’m still not where I want to be in terms of not allowing anxiety to interfere with my life, I also see that I’ve made a lot of improvements and that I’m quite proud of myself.

I can’t speak for everyone, of course, but I know that for me, one of my biggest fears is that I’ll never get through my anxiety like I want to – that anxiety will always hold me back from what I want to achieve. I hate the idea of never overcoming my fears and it scares me that there’s a possibility that I’ll always feel enslaved to something so awful. However, I also realize that because I’ve made so much progress, with hard work, I can continue to do so. This is a wonderful feeling.

It is so important that we recognize our progress – I can’t express this enough. Recognizing our achievements helps us to realize all that we can do and that overcoming and standing up to our fears isn’t as impossible as it may have originally seemed. Just because it may take more time than we’d like for us to make the amount of progress we want to see, doesn’t make it any less important and praise-worthy.

I want to tell you all something else that is very important – no matter how many steps or how small the steps might seem, every positive step towards progress matters! Don’t let anyone tell you anything different. If you’re taking positive steps in the right direction, it matters! Hard work matters!

 

 

The Importance of Positivity

With working on a book that will be filled with articles and poetry about positivity and getting through our struggles, I thought I would take the time to express why I feel writing about positivity is so important.

While sources of happiness, joy, and friendship surround us on a daily basis, I think we often pass them by without notice. It’s not necessarily our fault, it’s just hard sometimes when living our busy lives and hearing about such negativity in the world, to focus on all of the good. Though there are self-help books and other literary resources to help us find comfort and peace, I think that the best way to find strength and confidence within the literary world, is to find something that really connects with us; something we can all relate to. I think that reading helpful articles and poetry that build us up instead of making us feel small and belittled are the perfect thing to motivate us!

A few years ago, if you asked me what I thought about reading articles and poetry to help me through my anxiety and other struggles, I’m not sure I’d think it was such a great thing. Then again, a few years ago, I may have scoffed at the idea of blogging about my anxiety to make me feel better – man did I learn that I was wrong! It turns out that reading inspirational articles and poetry is a wonderful way to lift one’s spirits and raise one’s self-confidence. So is blogging! Expressing ourselves and our feelings, along with our emotions, through writing is a great way to connect with both ourselves and others – while helping ourselves and others as well.

Positivity – and the spreading thereof – is extremely important. We all need positivity in our lives and that is why it is important to me – and my loved one – to write this book that we are currently working on. It is a way of spreading positivity through writing. I hope you will join us in our journey of sharing and spreading hope.

 

New Writing Project!

B.W. Ginsburg

Hey everybody!

As many of you already know, I am currently working on a new novel! In addition, someone very special and I are working on an inspirational article and poetry book! I am very excited to share this news with all of you!

Struggling with anxiety, I have come to see the importance of gathering all the inspiration we can find. Whether it’s befriending someone who will be there to support us through thick and thin, or learning how to deal with past disappointments, we all need to search for ways to help us through the most difficult of times. I’m hoping that this collaboration with a loved one will help bring peace and hope to all of us who struggle.

In addition to being excited for this new project because I find it important to share words of wisdom and motivation, I am also thrilled to announce that…

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Good Days Are Possible

Some of you may know this, and some of you may not. Good days are possible.

I know that dealing with constant hardships can make it seem improbable that you will ever be happy and not burdened by worry, stress, and doubt. It may even seem as if good days simply aren’t in the cards for you; as if happiness just isn’t possible. The truth is though, that happiness is possible for all of us and so, are good days. We just have to work hard and fight for what we want.

Yesterday I had another great day. Let me tell you that there was a time when I doubted that I’d have a really good day like yesterday. After going out, a relative asked me how I had been doing lately and I explained that I was getting better at some things and that practicing facing my fears on a consistent basis was definitely helping me.

If you’re going through a tough time, I want you to know that there is hope – always. Please don’t give up on yourself and don’t give up on the fact that you can be happy and live a healthy, satisfying life. Good days are possible for all of us, and so is a good life.

 

Progress In Itself Is Its Own Reward!

Hey guys! Today I’d like to talk to you about a subject that is very important to me – progress and self-recognition.

I think many of us can agree that due to our struggles with anxiety (and any other mental health issues we may deal with) being so challenging, it is nice when any progress we make is recognized. While we don’t make progress just for others, we do like to know that our hard work is being noticed. Unfortunately, not everyone may appreciate or acknowledge just how much we’ve accomplished.

We need to remember the importance of self-recognition. Just because someone else may not appreciate all that we’re doing to overcome our fears and other obstacles, does not mean that we’re not making a great amount of progress. There are some people in the world who simply don’t understand that some things that seem simple to them can be extremely challenging to others. Also, while unfortunate, some people think that if you don’t attain perfection, then the progress you’ve made isn’t good enough. This isn’t true.

When we make progress – any amount of progress – we have to pat ourselves on the back. We have to tell ourselves what a good job we did and how we can overcome any obstacles that threaten to stand in our way. I understand wanting to share one’s progress with others, but we can’t always expect others to be as joyful as we are. However, we cannot let their possible lack of enthusiasm diminish ours. We must take pride in our accomplishments.

Also, while it’s more important that we appreciate our achievements than having others appreciate them, please remember that just because the people we tell may not seem overjoyed by our success, doesn’t mean they’re not. Sometimes people just get caught up in their own lives and don’t always show how happy for us they truly are.

The bottom line is this: making progress is reward in itself. Don’t let the possible lack of appreciation or acknowledgement shown by others make your progress seem less important or worthy of praise!

Progress Is Progress – Don’t Let Anyone Tell You Otherwise!

Maybe every time you’ve ever shared your progress with someone else, they’ve commended you. Maybe you’ve never had someone question how the progress you’ve made can really be labeled as such. I think that’s great. However, I know that I, for one, have experienced otherwise.

Don’t get me wrong, many times when I share my progress with someone, they are proud of me and express those feelings of pride. They understand that if I’m doing something that I previously struggled with – no matter what it is – that it matters. Even if the step towards success may seem small, they see that it’s important.

On the opposite end, I’ve had people question my progress. I’ve mentioned that I did something that I usually back away from and instead of hearing their praise or that they think I did well, they just ask how it’s a big deal; how it qualifies as progress. I’m not going to lie – it hurts. I’m not saying that I constantly need recognition, but the last thing a person wants when they share their accomplishments with you, is to feel belittled or shut down. Any of us who have ever struggled with anything, know how difficult it can be to overcome our obstacles. We also know how good and refreshing it feels when it’s clear that they we stronger than what is holding us back. We want to be built up by ourselves and the ones we love, not torn down.

If you’ve experienced what I have – that some people aren’t understanding or kind when it comes to our struggles and hearing about our progress – then here is my advice. I recommend trying to save sharing your progress for the people who will actually appreciate and respect it. I know it’s hard not to want to shout your progress from the rooftop, but sometimes lending your happiness to others is a risky concept. Not everyone will be supportive and instead of showing you the respect you deserve, some will simply share harsh or careless words.

Again, and this is important to remember, there are people who will support, respect, and care for you. There are people who will go out of their way to cheer you on and to make you feel as special as you truly are. These are the people you want to allow into your lives and share both your good and bad times with. Don’t allow others to take away your sense of pride and accomplishment. No one can take away your progress, no one!

How It Feels

I hope that everyone had a Merry Christmas yesterday and a great day! Today I’d like to talk about something pretty amazing that I experienced while out for the holidays.

While usually I’m pretty calm when I’m at somebody else’s house, I don’t usually walk around a lot.My anxiety makes me feel kind of shaky, weak, and off balance so I usually stay on the couch while away from home. However, yesterday I actually got up myself and walked in and out of the kitchen. I also sat down at the kitchen table and talked to my aunt.

Now maybe to some, this isn’t a big deal. Heck, there was a time when these kinds of things wouldn’t have been a big deal to me either – man I miss those times. However, it felt really good yesterday doing something with little anxiety – I felt like my old self.

These times in our lives remind us that we have the strength to get through our anxiety and that there is physically nothing wrong with us. Anxiety can play tricks on us, but in the end, that’s all they are. Anxiety lies to us all the time and it’s times of success that we have to hold on to, for these are the times when our true selves are revealed.

Something else that these times show us is the importance of practice. If we want to continue to experience times that are free from anxiety, we need to be consistent in exercising and facing our fears.

We can get through our anxiety! We just need to believe in ourselves and work hard! It feels wonderful to see ourselves making progress and returning to a life that we can fully enjoy!

Being Around Great People, Compliments, and Good Days!

There’s definitely something to be said about being around people who respect, understand, and care for you. There are so many people in this world that just being around them, brightens your day. These people are amazing and they should be reminded as such. Not only are they there for you, but they make you feel good about yourself. They leave you feeling strong and extra-confident.

Yesterday I got my hair cut by an amazing woman. She’s smart, funny, and kind. She understands what I go through and she makes an effort to make me feel good about myself and really listen to what I have to say. I love having people like this in my life. Though there are some people that will never be able to understand what we go through and who have trouble showing respect, there are others who will go out of their way to make the world a better, kinder place. I am very happy to say that I have people like this in my life.

We should all aspire to be individuals who care for others. We should all offer sincere compliments, a listening ear, and a shoulder to cry on if needed. We should all strive to make someone’s day a little better and you know what? We all have the ability to be that kind of person!

Impatience

Hey everyone!

So when I was younger, I was often told that I was impatient. I like to think that I’ve gotten better at this, but once in a while, I just get so excited that I can hardly wait for something. On one hand, I think this is a good thing. It means that I’m excited and looking forward to something great! Who doesn’t want that? However, at the same time, being impatient can really suck.

I was (and am) super excited about something happening in my life. The thing is though that while I thought this certain thing would happen unbelievably soon, I think it may end up taking a little longer than I would have hoped. I’m not going to lie, it bums me out. You should have seen me. I was so full of energy and pep because of this great thing happening and now, I feel like I’ve lost a little bit of that spark.

As hard as it is though to have to wait longer for this wonderful thing to happen, I know that it will happen. I also know that when it does, it’ll feel pretty amazing! I’m realizing that the reason I’m disappointed is because what is happening is so amazing that I don’t want to wait any longer. When you think about it, that’s pretty great. It’s wonderful that I have something going on that’s so special and important to me!

I’m writing this because I know how hard it can be to wait for something that you’re so excited about! You make plans, map things out in your head, and then poof, you hit a snag or find that your plans might be delayed. Even if by delayed you mean an extra week, it can sometimes feel like forever. What I want to remind everyone (including myself) though is that the reason for your impatience is because you’re about to experience something wonderful – something worthwhile, and you don’t want to have it put off. Isn’t that the ultimate dream? That we get to experience something so amazing?

Next time you find yourself growing impatient because something wonderful might take longer than expected, remember how great it is that this amazing thing is going to happen! Don’t lose your excitement! Good things come to those who wait.

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