Simple Respect

Today I would like to talk about something very close to my heart – simple respect.

First of all, as many of you know, I suffer from severe anxiety. I overthink and sometimes I get so anxious, that my body feels weak. While I’m smart enough to know that nothing is wrong with me physically, that does not stop my body from going through the motions.

I am ashamed to say, that sometimes, feeling weak due to my anxiety causes me to sit down in inconvenient places – on the floors in restaurants, in stairwells when I was going to school (not actually on the steps themselves, but the landing in between), etc. I hate this! It’s embarrassing and I know what an inconvenience it is for others, as well as for myself. With that being said, I am not able to just snap my fingers and make my anxiety vanish without a trace. I wish I could, but I can’t. Also, I think that people around someone struggling should be understanding. If they don’t know how to help, fine, but they shouldn’t go out of their way to make things more difficult.

Let me give you an example. Today I went to a restaurant and became extremely anxious. I had to sit down on the floor. Am I proud of this? No. Am I embarrassed? Yes. People stared. While I didn’t like that, I understood. As human beings, we’re curious and me sitting there looking panicky probably seemed strange. Fine. However, one of the workers at this particular restaurant gave me an extremely dirty look and was very rude.

I understand that what I did was not appropriate or proper. I understand that sitting on the floor at a restaurant is not what is perceived as normal. Like I said, I’m extremely embarrassed. Even so, I do not think I deserve to be treated the way I was. I was not disruptive to any of the customers (I quietly sat down and waited about a minute before I could get back up) and other than people staring, I did not cause a big scene.

If you are reading this and you work at a business where you are around a lot of people, please remember to be kind and considerate. You may not understand what someone is going through, but that does not mean that they do not deserve your respect. Also, if you want to ask someone nicely to please try harder to get through their struggles, do so nicely. Trust me when I say that it is hard enough for someone to go through something difficult without others making them feel even worse than they already do.

If you would like advice on how to be kinder to those around you, please do not hesitate to ask. Also if you see someone struggling and want to help, but don’t know how, please ask them in a polite matter. Sometimes just trying your best to be kind can make all the difference.

Advertisements
Standard

“I’ve Been Here Before”

I’ve been here before.

This is what I thought last night as I struggled with anxiety. I thought about how I was tired of ending up in the same situation – feeling both sad and weak due to my anxiety. I thought about how I wish I could go back to doing simple things without feeling anxious.

I’m not going to sit here and tell you that I never feel hopeless and downtrodden, because I do. I hate feeling burdened with anxiety; feeling like its in control. Believe it or not, I used to be someone who loved to go out shopping, hang out with friends, and be able to do things without much stress. I still like doing those things, but I don’t feel like they’re easy anymore. I hate that feeling.

As I sat struggling last night, I wondered how and if I’d ever get through my anxiety. After all, I’ve been going through it for so long, how can I be sure it will ever be a thing of the past? I don’t think this is a totally unreasonable question. It’s hard to have faith sometimes when you constantly see yourself suffering.

The thing that we all have to remember, is that many of us have made progress. Many of us have faced our fears and succeeded – I know I have. Just because we may have bad days or moments, does not mean that we haven’t experienced times of achievement or that we’re not on the road to recovery. All it means is that we have to work harder on a more consistent basis. We will get through our anxiety and over our other obstacles!

So if you’re wondering how you’re supposed to believe in yourself, you’re not alone. I think many people feel this way. It’s okay to sometimes feel less than 100% confident, you’re only human. What’s not okay is to allow these doubts to take control, to give them credence. We are stronger than our obstacles!

Standard

National Mental Health Day

Today is National Mental Health Day. Before I begin, I would like to thank everyone who supports me in my journey to get through anxiety. It’s a difficult issue to deal with and I am extremely grateful for your support!

One of the things that really bothers me are the misconceptions that surround mental health issues. There are many that upset me, but one of the ones that I personally deal with the most is the assumption that mental health issues are easy to get through and that they are a sign of immaturity, weakness, or laziness. None of these things are true. Mental health issues can be just as difficult to deal with as physical ones. For some reason, many people seem to dismiss this fact.

Battling with negative thoughts, irrational fears, and other mental health problems is not easy. It’s not something that you can just snap out of. Just because getting through anxiety or over other obstacles can take time, does not mean that those who struggle are not trying their absolute hardest on a daily basis.

I personally have struggled with anxiety for several years and know first hand how difficult dealing with the mental health issue can be. There are so many things that I love to do that anxiety holds me back from doing. Yes, I try my hardest to overcome my fears, but that does not mean that my anxiety will just vanish. I only wish it was that simple.

I know that I can’t expect everyone to understand – none of us can. There will always be people who don’t know what it’s like to struggle with a mental health issue. There will always be people who think that we are making up our struggles or simply not strong enough to overcome them. What’s important is that we believe in ourselves and that we remind ourselves that we are stronger than our anxiety.

If you are reading this and are someone who finds it difficult to understand what others go through, please try to remember that we all struggle with something. Just because you may not deal with the same issues, does not mean that they are not real. Also, even if you can’t exactly understand what someone is going through, please try your hardest to be kind to those around you.

To those of you who struggle, you can get through this!

 

Standard

THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!

Okay, I have some pretty exciting news! I have officially reached over 1,000 followers on here! So many of you are such amazing friends and have continued to be utterly supportive throughout the years. I cannot thank you enough! I originally started this blog when my therapist and dad both told me that writing about my anxiety might help me feel better, along with help others to realize that they are not alone in their struggles. Just thinking that I could have made a difference means the world to me and the fact that so many of you have been here for me is truly inspirational and appreciated!

I know that I haven’t been on here as much as I used to be, and for that, I’m sorry. I intend to check in on you guys more often because so many of you have been here for me when I’ve needed someone to talk to. I wish I could express in words what that’s meant to me, but I don’t think that I can. Please just trust me when I say that your friendship and loving comments have truly made a difference.

I hope you all know that if you ever need to talk, I’m here for you. I hope you also know that even if it feels like you’re alone in dealing with your struggles, you’re not. There will always be people that will care about you and love you, and if you look carefully, you will find someone that you can trust and share your feelings and experiences with.

I also want to tell you this – you can get through your struggles and over your obstacles! If you work hard on a consistent basis and never give up, you will succeed. You may not get through your challenges overnight, but if you put in the effort to make progress, it will happen! I know that sometimes it may feel otherwise, I know there are times when I still wonder if I’ll ever get through my anxiety. I have to remember though that I have made progress, because you know what? I have!

So again, thank you to everyone who follows my blog! Thank you to all of the wonderful people I have met on here and to those of you who have been such amazing friends! Thanks for the incredibly kind and supportive comments and for reminding me that I am not alone in my journey of getting through anxiety!

Thank You,

-B.

 

Google Images

 

Standard

Stop Beating Yourself Up!

Stop beating yourself up! Easily said, easily done, right? Not so much. I’m always trying to explain that just because one may struggle with something or not get something done at the same pace as someone else, that it doesn’t make them pathetic or a failure. I believe this, I really do, but that doesn’t mean that there aren’t times when I don’t find myself thinking how pathetic I must be to struggle the way I do.

I’m not proud of this – but these are the facts. I don’t have a job right now, I still live at home with my family, and anxiety still effects me a great deal. I hate struggling with anxiety, I truly do, but that’s how it is right now. I try hard on a daily basis to get better and I hope that one day, anxiety will no longer hold me back from accomplishing all that I want to do.

Society tells us that if we don’t all do things at the same time, then we must be pathetic or that something must be wrong with us. THIS IS NOT TRUE! This should not be used an excuse not to try our hardest to overcome our obstacles, but we should not think ourselves pathetic or abnormal for not always meeting society’s standards. We all deal with different things and we all accomplish our goals at different times. What’s important is that we always try our hardest to get through whatever it is that’s holding us back and that we NEVER GIVE UP!

As I was lying down this morning, feeling pathetic, I realized something. I want to work, I want to be more independent, I want to get through my anxiety. The reason for me not having a job is not out of laziness or not wanting to do something more with my life, but because my anxiety is so severe. Also, it’s not as if I’m not trying to get better. I’m trying every single day! Also, I’ve made progress and I’m not useless – none of us are! I am a freelance writer for a great website, I’ve written and published two books and am currently working on my third, and I’ve made and am continuing to make progress when it comes to getting through my anxiety. All of these things are important! All of these things matter!

So remember, it doesn’t necessarily matter if you’re meeting society’s standards and expectations. What matters is that you’re trying your hardest to overcome your obstacles. No one but you knows exactly what you’re struggling with, no one but you can make your life all it can be. If you’re trying your hardest to get through what’s holding you back and if you refuse to give up on your goals, that’s what’s important!

 

Standard

Progress Is Progress – Don’t Let Anyone Tell You Otherwise!

Maybe every time you’ve ever shared your progress with someone else, they’ve commended you. Maybe you’ve never had someone question how the progress you’ve made can really be labeled as such. I think that’s great. However, I know that I, for one, have experienced otherwise.

Don’t get me wrong, many times when I share my progress with someone, they are proud of me and express those feelings of pride. They understand that if I’m doing something that I previously struggled with – no matter what it is – that it matters. Even if the step towards success may seem small, they see that it’s important.

On the opposite end, I’ve had people question my progress. I’ve mentioned that I did something that I usually back away from and instead of hearing their praise or that they think I did well, they just ask how it’s a big deal; how it qualifies as progress. I’m not going to lie – it hurts. I’m not saying that I constantly need recognition, but the last thing a person wants when they share their accomplishments with you, is to feel belittled or shut down. Any of us who have ever struggled with anything, know how difficult it can be to overcome our obstacles. We also know how good and refreshing it feels when it’s clear that they we stronger than what is holding us back. We want to be built up by ourselves and the ones we love, not torn down.

If you’ve experienced what I have – that some people aren’t understanding or kind when it comes to our struggles and hearing about our progress – then here is my advice. I recommend trying to save sharing your progress for the people who will actually appreciate and respect it. I know it’s hard not to want to shout your progress from the rooftop, but sometimes lending your happiness to others is a risky concept. Not everyone will be supportive and instead of showing you the respect you deserve, some will simply share harsh or careless words.

Again, and this is important to remember, there are people who will support, respect, and care for you. There are people who will go out of their way to cheer you on and to make you feel as special as you truly are. These are the people you want to allow into your lives and share both your good and bad times with. Don’t allow others to take away your sense of pride and accomplishment. No one can take away your progress, no one!

Standard

Goodreads Abstract Clarity Character Quiz!

Test Your Book Knowledge!

B.W. Ginsburg

Hey everyone! I just finished creating a new quiz on Goodreads! Now you can test your knowledge of the characters found in my short story collection, Abstract Clarity! To take the quiz, click the link below! Good luck!

https://www.goodreads.com/quizzes/1127020-abstract-clarity-character-quiz

If you’ve yet to purchase a copy of Abstract Clarity and wish to do so, you can purchase a paperback copy or Kindle copy by going on https://www.amazon.com/B.W.-Ginsburg/e/B01MU5Y0YL/ref=sr_ntt_srch_lnk_1?qid=1501952519&sr=8-1

To view all the Goodreads quizzes for my books, click here!

THANK YOU FOR ALL YOUR SUPPORT!

View original post

Standard