Hard Times

I didn’t have a good night last night. I got really anxious and found it hard to do simple things. Admittedly, I cried and got really upset. Sometimes everything just adds up and it’s hard to handle.

While I wish I didn’t have to learn these things (as I wish I didn’t have to deal with anxiety), getting as anxious as I did and having the experience that I had did teach me a few things. For one thing, it taught me that there are some people who will try their hardest to help you and there are others who, if they don’t understand what you’re going through, find it difficult and maybe impossible to help you get through whatever you’re struggling with.

Many of you who struggle with anxiety may understand that sometimes, when anxious, there are some things that help us relax. Whether it’s keeping a light on while we get things done or talking on the phone with someone to get our minds off whatever we’re doing, it can sometimes help to have something that calms us down.

Last night, one of my relatives found it hard to let me have those things that bring me some comfort. I admit that sometimes when I’m stressed, I like to keep the light on in the room where I need to get things done. I might need to leave the room to relax before going back in, but I like to keep the light on so when I go back in the room, it can be as effortless as possible. Maybe to some that seems silly, but it makes things easier for me and if you ask me, it’s not too much to ask. However, my relative felt the need to turn off the light because he couldn’t understand how keeping it on helped me. Also, when I asked if he could bring me my cell phone so that I’d feel more comfortable having it by my side, he didn’t do that for me either.

This can be extremely frustrating. These are simple, harmless tasks that someone could help me with so that I would feel better and yet, because they don’t understand what I’m going through, some people refuse to do it. While some people will try their hardest to make you feel better, others find it hard to help.

Another thing I learned last night is how important it is to work harder to get through my anxiety. So many times I don’t exercise or practice facing my fears because I’m “too tired” or lazy. I want to get through my anxiety so much and every time I struggle, I feel horrible both during and afterwards. Why then, would I not put my laziness aside, and try my hardest to practice and exercise?

Next time I feel too lazy to exercise, I’m going to try to remember that it’s better to wake up or get up and exercise than to later experience the consequence for not practicing face my fears. Also, I need to remember that some people will be willing to help and others may not be. This doesn’t mean that those who don’t help don’t love us, they may just not know how to help, etc. No matter what, we have to try to learn to get through things on our own. This doesn’t mean though that we can’t ask for assistance from those we trust.

I’d like to thank all of you who support me!

 

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16 thoughts on “Hard Times

  1. Keep hanging in there my friend. The great thing is you know what you are dealing with, so it put you in a better position to do they best you can to adjust to your anxiety and face your fears.
    Sometimes the ones closest to us, may not be the one to help us when we need it most…so I am glad you have an understanding of that and don’t hold grudges. At times relatives eventually come around and sometimes they do not and when the latter happens it may hurt. But that is OK…because you still have support and remember that although you can not choose your family, you can choose your friends. I am sending a virtual hug and reinforcement your way.

  2. Difficult moments like this are a normal part of recovery. It doesn’t mean you failed. All your progress is still valid. Just keep trying. We believe in you!
    Also, I’m doing your quotes challenge today – thanks for inviting me into that 🙂

  3. I understand this all too well, you are right some people unfortunately don’t know how to support us when we are struggling. But it is frustrating! Especially if they are unintentionally making things worse.
    I’m sorry you are struggling with your anxiety more at the moment, but people are totally right set backs are part of recovery that everyone experiences. I hope things get a little easier soon 🙂

  4. I’m sorry to read this B, but it sounds like you have found out a few things because of it. Sometimes we have to experience the bad days so that we can appreciate the good ones. 🙂

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