Acknowledging Even the Tiniest of Improvements

It is so important for us to acknowledge when we make improvements. Even if there are things that seem insignificant compared to what else we could have done better at, we need to try our hardest to focus on the positive. You might be saying to yourself that what you improved at might be smaller than what you did worse at. For example, if you stayed at a restaurant longer than usual but you still couldn’t eat due to your anxiety, you might feel that the negative cancels out the positive. As hard as it may be to focus on the positive, it is important.

When we focus on our progress, no matter how small or insignificant it may seem, we remind ourselves that we can make progress. If we can make progress in one area, chances are that we can make progress in another.

No positive progress is insignificant. All progress that brings us closer to getting over our obstacles and through our fears is important. It may not feel this way when we compare what we’re getting better at to what we’re still struggling with, but we’re still making progress and that is what’s important. Just as we shouldn’t compare ourselves with others, we should try not to compare our progress with our setbacks. If we are making progress, we are on the right track.

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Having Faith In Yourself (Even If Someone Else May Not)

Unfortunately, sometimes there are people that won’t have faith in you. There are people who will see you struggle and if you are not where they think you should be at a certain time, they’ll feel like you’re never going to get there. As much as we may want others’ approval or want them to believe in us, we cannot always depend on it. We have to believe in ourselves.

It’s not always easy having faith in ourselves. When we see ourselves struggle, we tend to focus on the negative and wonder if we’ll ever get better for good. It’s also hard to see others place doubt in us, especially if it’s those who we love. For a lot of reasons, sometimes it seems that if others don’t have faith in us, we shouldn’t either. However, that’s not true. We need, yes, need, to have faith in ourselves. I admit that it can be difficult, but it’s essential.

You may be wondering how you’re supposed to have faith in yourself when others around you may not. For one thing, next time you hear someone speaking negatively about you, go and try to do something positive that will show yourself that you do have the strength to overcome your obstacles. Also, remind yourself that you do not want to become rude or bitter like the individual who is speaking negatively about you. Practice facing your fears so that you can become a positive and happy person.

I love the quote that is above, “Don’t worry about those who talk behind your back, they’re behind you for a reason”. People who are rude and concentrate on the negative things about you rather than the positive are usually unhappy themselves. They feel out of control and therefore, they try to control you or treat you poorly. You, however, do not have to be like them. You can chose to help people and treat them well. Just because you are struggling does not mean you have to treat others who are struggling with disrespect. It is possible for you to take your experiences with hardships and use them to help others and yourself.

You do not need others to believe in you to believe in yourself. Sure, it would be nice if you had everyone’s support, but chances are that someone out there won’t be supportive. You can still have faith in yourself though by showing yourself that you are stronger than your anxiety and other issues. Don’t give up on yourself!

I want to thank everyone who supports me, whether it be in person or on my blog!

A World Without Goals…

Today I would like to remind everyone how important it is to have goals in life. In order to get through our anxiety and other issues, we need to set goals for ourselves! A special thank you to theseeds4life.com for turning my quote into this beautiful image!

“A world without goals is like life without water – dry, stale, and impossible to live without.”

Quote by: B.G., gettingthroughanxiety.wordpress.com

Bulletproof

We witness a lot of negativity in our lives. We see negative people, negative behaviors, and negative events. We cannot always control how negative people act or behave, but we can control how we deal with it.

 
If someone is putting you down, you can tell them kindly that you love them, but don’t wish to listen to their negative words. Then you need to walk away and practice facing your fears and practice making yourself a better person; a person filled with positivity and happiness. Take the negative words and actions of others and turn them into this: a lesson that you should be positive and happy instead of negative and miserable. Teach yourself to be kind and confident, along with strong. Remind yourself that negative people are unhappy and work on making yourself the opposite!

 
It can be difficult being in tense situations. What if someone is treating you poorly and you want to stand up for yourself, but remain kind and calm? What if you want to stand your ground without getting into an argument? Luckily, there is an answer! What is it? We calmly state that while we love the individual that we are having a disagreement with, we do not agree with them and that we do not wish to deal with their negativity. Now, the other person may not respond well to this, but that’s okay. All you have to do is keep repeating yourself and then just walk away. It is possible to be both kind and strong at the same time. All we have to do is put on our metaphorical bulletproof vests!

 
Along with dealing with those who are rude to us, we are sometimes put in situations when we see the ones we love treated with disrespect. Sometimes we should kindly stand up for these people, but sometimes because of the fact that unfortunately, arguments can be between two people we love, sometimes we just need to remove ourselves from the situation and let them handle it themselves. The same lesson applies here though: that while we cannot always control what goes on around us, we can deal with how we cope with it. When we see two or more people we love not getting along, we can step aside and practice making ourselves the kind of people who are respectful, kind, forgiving, and strong.

 
Here’s a song by No Doubt that I thought might be helpful in getting my point across. It shows that while you may be struggling or dealing with some issues (whether it be anxiety or something else), you can get through it!

 

GET IN LINE AND SETTLE DOWN
GET IN LINE AND SETTLE DOWN

WHAT’S YOUR 20 (DO YOU COPY?)
WHERE’S YOUR BRAIN (DO YOU COPY?)
CHECKING IN TO CHECK YOU OUT
CONCERNED ABOUT YOUR WHEREABOUTS
COPY THAT (DO YOU COPY?)
YOU’RE ACTING STRANGE (DO YOU COPY?)
SO TELL ME WHAT IS GOING ON
IT’S SO HEAVY I BET

I’M FINE (NOTHING’S GONNA KNOCK THIS GIRL DOWN)
I’M HELLA POSITIVE FOR REAL I’M ALL GOOD

NO I’M FINE (NOTHING’S GONNA KNOCK THIS GIRL DOWN)

IT’S KINDA COMPLICATED THAT’S FOR SURE

BUT YOU CAN SEE IT IN MY EYES
YOU CAN READ IT ON MY LIPS
I’M TRYING TO GET A HOLD ON THIS
AND I REALLY MEAN IT THIS TIME
AND YOU KNOW IT’S SUCH A TRIP
DON’T GET ME STARTED
I’M TRYING TO GET A HOLD ON THIS

GET IN LINE AND SETTLE DOWN
GET IN LINE AND SETTLE DOWN

NO BIG DEAL (I CAN HANDLE IT)
IT’LL BOUNCE OFF ME (I CAN HANDLE IT)
BEEN AROUND THE BLOCK BEFORE
DOESN’T MATTER ANYMORE
HERE WE GO AGAIN (ARE YOU KIDDING ME?)
ARE YOU INSANE? (ARE YOU KIDDING ME?)
UNDERNEATH THE AVALANCHE
IT’S SO HEAVY AGAIN

I’M FINE (NOTHING’S GONNA KNOCK THIS GIRL DOWN)
I’M HELLA POSITIVE FOR REAL I’M ALL GOOD

NO I’M FINE (NOTHING’S GONNA KNOCK THIS GIRL DOWN)

IT’S KINDA COMPLICATED THAT’S FOR SURE
BUT YOU CAN SEE IT IN MY EYES
YOU CAN READ IT ON MY LIPS
I’M TRYING TO GET A HOLD ON THIS

AND I REALLY MEAN IT THIS TIME
AND YOU KNOW IT’S SUCH A TRIP
DON’T GET ME STARTED
I’M TRYING TO GET A HOLD ON THIS

GET IN LINE AND SETTLE DOWN
GET IN LINE AND SETTLE DOWN

GOT YOU 10-4 LOVER
I’M A ROUGH AND TOUGH, I’M A ROUGH AND TOUGH
NOTHING’S GONNA KNOCK THIS GIRL DOWN

BUT YOU CAN SEE IT IN MY EYES
YOU CAN READ IT ON MY LIPS
I’M TRYING TO GET A HOLD ON THIS
AND I REALLY MEAN IT THIS TIME
AND YOU KNOW IT’S SUCH A TRIP
DON’T GET ME STARTED
I’M TRYING TO GET A HOLD ON THIS
GOTTA GET A HOLD ON THIS
TRYING TO GET A HOLD ON THIS
DON’T GET ME STARTED
GOTTA GET A HOLD ON THIS

GET IN LINE AND SETTLE DOWN
GET IN LINE AND SETTLE DOWN

*Lyrics found on http://www.nodoubt.com

**Some people have said this song is about drugs. Personally, I don’t think so. I think it’s about the fact that we’re all fighting to get through something and that while it may be hard, we can get through it. Please do not take me posting this song the wrong way. We all have different ideas behind the meaning of songs, and I believe this one has to do with having issues but being able to overcome them in healthy ways (so no, not by taking drugs not prescribed by a doctor!).

If You Feel Like You Can, Do!

Have you ever just woken up and felt like you were up to a challenge? Up to doing something that you’ve struggled with in the past? Take advantage of your good mood, of feeling confident in yourself. Don’t say, “I feel like I can do this, but I think I’ll wait until tomorrow.” If you feel like you can do something…do it! When we feel like we can get through our anxiety, we have to go for it! These times remind us that we do have the ability to face our fears, to get over our obstacles.

If you did something healthy that you are proud of yourself for doing, give yourself praise for taking a step towards accomplishing your goal! Don’t let your progress go unnoticed and don’t blow it off as just pure luck. Take this opportunity to remind yourself that you are stronger than your anxiety or other struggles you face. You have worked hard in order to make progress and you have!

Hold on to the memory of your success. It is so important to hold on to positive experiences, for they pave the way for more positivity and confidence. Continue to work hard so that you can experience more positive moments!

  

Disappointed

I’m disappointed in myself. While I’m proud of myself that I made an effort to do something, I hate the fact that it didn’t go nearly as well as I would have hoped. I hate feeling anxious so much that I can’t do what I want or enjoy things that I would usually love to do.

I want to go back to being able to do what I used to without feeling so anxious; to fully enjoy things in life. I know that this won’t happen all at once and I know I have to work hard so that I can get better. Still though, I hate going through this and I hate struggling so much.

It’s hard for me to let my feelings of disappointment go. It’s hard for me to just say, “Well, I did okay, but I could have done better. I’ll try harder next time.” For some reason, I hold on to the negative and I focus on my times of suffering. I wish I could just let it go and move on, but it’s not always that easy.

I do believe I’ll get through my anxiety and I will continue to practice facing my fears. It’s still difficult though to see myself going through this time and time again. I hate seeing myself back in a position where I feel anxious and stressed out when I should be calm. Also, while I try not to, I do worry that I’ll never get better–even though I believe I will get through this.

I just want everyone who struggles with anxiety or another issue to know that I understand how it feels to see yourself struggling with something that used to come so easily. I know what it’s like to wish you could just do something without feeling anxious but then find that you feel unable to get through something calmly. I’m sorry you go through this and please know that if you continue to try, you will get through this. I know it may seem impossible, but it’s not.

 

Learning From Your Struggles and Successes

It can be difficult when we struggle to focus afterwards or even during our anxiety on what we can do to improve ourselves. When anxiety strikes, we tend to only focus on how we feel and when the anxiety passes, we oftentimes just want to move on and not think about what we can do differently next time. However, we have to try. If we get anxious because we’re doing public speaking or even walking down the street, we have to learn how we can help ourselves and how we can control our anxiety or at least get through it. We have to decide how to go about improving our lives.

Not only do we have to focus on how to get better, but we also need to focus on how we made progress. For example, let’s say that you usually struggle with something, but this time you got through it with minimum to no anxiety. Why do you think you got through it this time? Is it because you’ve been practicing facing your fears more? Exercising more? Do you think it’s because you relaxed before you did that something or gave yourself a few extra deep breaths before taking on the challenge? We have to remember what we did to succeed and we have to try to repeat that. We have to try to remember that we were successful and therefore can be again. If last time you feel that you weren’t as successful as you wish you were, than try harder this time and try to figure out a way to get better!