Due to our busy lives and anxiety, we often allow our health to fall by the wayside. Whether because we forget or simply shrug off practicing in order to overcome our anxiety, we unfortunately tend to not make as much progress as we may have hoped. While there are other important things in life, these tasks’ importance pale in comparison to ones’ health. After all, what is a busy life without being healthy? Practicing everyday is important to overcome our fears and this is why, while difficult at times, we must practice everyday.
I know I have spoken multiple times on the topic of manipulation and how at times, it can be hard to not let others manipulate you. I can certaintly relate to how good someone can be at manipulation; being someone that has experienced someone trying to manipulate me in the past. You feel certain that you are right about something and that the person you love cannot make you feel bad about yourself, but you love them so much that somehow, they get to you. However, it is important that you remember that as long as you are trying your hardest and know that you are improving, that it does not matter if the other person feels you are not getting better.
Sometimes because others are not patient enough or understanding enough when it comes to our situations, they tend to feel that because we are not improving at the pace that they expect us to, that we are not trying hard enough. What we have to realize is that their impatience and their disappointment is their issue that they must deal with. I know that it is hard to stand up to someone we love and not let them bring us down; after all they are the ones that we have always felt that we could go to and count on for support. However, sometimes due to their own issues, it is hard for the ones we love to understand that it takes time to get better. This does not mean that these individuals do not care for us, but rather that they do not know how to go about helping and as a result, they struggle to comprehend the fact that it takes time to accomplish true success. It is important to remember that as long as we strive to overcome our anxiety and continue to practice, we will get through our fears.
Whether it be something exciting that happened to you in general or something exciting in terms of facing your fears, you should be proud of your accomplishments; it is important to reflect on ones’ success. However, while we should embrace success, this does not mean we should stop practicing. Most likely practicing is what brought us success in the first place and if we want to continue to overcome our anxiety, we must continue to face our fears.
Often times, we let ourselves get in the way of our own success. We may not do this on purpose, but we find it hard to overcome our fears. I’ve watched this movie before, but the moment I heard this quote yesterday, I knew it was a quote that I could relate to and that anyone trying to overcome their fears should consider.
“I didn’t know what was waiting for me. Although my stomach hurt and my eyes were watering I’d made up my mind that nothing was gonna stop me. Not even me.” -Oskar Schell, Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close (imdb.com)
A few posts ago, I talked about manipulation and how there are people who make us feel bad because we suffer with anxiety. While I understand that it is hard when others treat us with disrespect, we have to remember that as long as we are really trying to get better and know we are trying, it does not matter what others say. In addition, while I understand wanting to get better for others, there are also reasons we need to try to get better for ourselves. When we are successful, it feels amazing; we can see and feel the difference between feeling anxious and and being confident. Also, when we work hard and practice, we improve our health and instead of anxiety, we are filled with confidence. Not only is overcoming anxiety helpful in our relationships with others, but more importantly by practicing and overcoming our fears and anxieties, we are helping OURSELVES. I know it can be hectic worrying about what others think of you, but as long as you work hard, it reallly doesn’t matter. We need to strive to get better and we have to promise ourselves never to give up.
It’s hard enough to go through anxiety without people sharing their negative comments. While I have, in the past, encountered individuals that take it upon themselves to be rude when they know I am suffering, the experience I had today seems one of the worst ones yet. I’ve known this person for a long time now and the sad thing is that even while they too suffer with anxiety, they were still not sympathtic to my situation. Instead, the person both made me feel guilty about my issue and made me feel even more anxious than I was already feeling.
Now, this person may have been trying to help, I cannot be sure. This is not the first incident I have had with this individual however. There is a point when we have to make a decision. Do we continue to suffer and be put through feeling terrible about our anxiety symptoms due to someone else’s negativity and bad attitude or should we distance ourselves from that negativity?
This is not always an easy decision to make. Like I mentioned, I have known this person my whole life. Also, while this person has hurt my feelings on several occasions, they do still have good qualities and have helped me in many ways. Therefore, I’m not going to abandon my relationship with this person altogether, but rather I’m going to make the decision to respect myself enough to know when not to throw myself under the bus; I’m not going to place myself in a situation where I know I am going to be treated poorly. We should still respect people that we may not always agree with, but at times we need to realize that we need to distance ourselves from negative comments.